So things have been interesting since I've returned from the Ivory Tower of Knowledge...what with the hazards of the new gun belt, a new employee who's evidently extremely sensitive and can't take constructive criticism, and the stitches in my finger and palm.

Today just kind of took the cake.

So I'm doing a monthly report, and Maintenance calls me to ask if I put another dog in the pen with Sally, and when I said no, they said..."um...well, you'd better get down here. They're kind of...um...stuck together." Ewww nooooooooo. Yes, there IS another dog in the pen, and NO, it's not mine. Actually, it looked like a fat half Rottweiler, half weenie dog, and he’d pried the door open. I shut the little hussy in the house and shooed him away, but I'm afraid it may take a bb-gun for him to get the message that Ashlie’s Red-Light Doggie District is now closed. Then I called the vet in a pure panic see what to do, because I SURE don’t want Beagleweenieweiler pups – they said since she’s getting fixed on the 25th, it’s no problem. Big sigh of relief.

Then, the Rudest People In The World called the park. I think what they wanted was directions to Crowley's Ridge, but the Ranger had answered the phone. They hung up on him because of his "smart mouth", which I don't understand because I was standing right there and heard the whole conversation - he was being very friendly. Then they called back and berated me about "how he was rude to my friend" and "how we need to screen our employees better and teach some customer service!" Then after getting no satisfaction from me (evidently), they called back and showed their sophistication by yelling, "F*&# you and your job, BITCH!" and hanging up. Classy.

It does all have a bright side. Sally will not be a mama of any strange looking puppies, and I was told by my friend Cheryl that I am now a real officer, having been dubbed the title of "bitch."